Mental Association.. and on Angel Boy Encounters
Loving the new baner/template. Funny .. what do you think my little word association thing was, for "The L Word". ? :) You might not get it right necessarily as two came to mind. Bit of a seesaw really.
And on that, I caught up with Angel Boy again on Thurs night. Weak I know. I missed him. He told me he had missed me as well. I just wanted some company but wasn't fooling myself into thinking he'd changed or would change. He was quite keen to come window shopping with me while I looked at electrical goods. I thought it was really amusing/quaint when he went to talk to the salesmen on my behalf trying to act like "The Man" and take charge (silly mental picture at this point of him in a cowboy hat chewing on straw saying let me take care of this litte missy which had me almost giggling to myself as these salesmen knew me pretty well from a lot of brow-beatings over the year). Well, the salesman who started talking to us had seen me in there only about 4 days previous when Betty the laptop had gone bung for a little bit. Whatever it was, mister salesman, while trying to wriggle out of honouring the warranty, triggered both my ire for a bit and something in the latop obviously got jostled enough for it to start working again. Wahoo. I thanked him, let us both out of that debate and sadly, went on to shop for laptop bags as I'd brought Betty in to them in a woven shopping bag. Sadly, because one minute I was about to do battle, the next I'm spending more cash in the same store. Pathetic. But I got a lovely bag which I desperately needed. Or so I'd convinced myself. ;)
So to flash forward again to the Thursday night just gone, Angel is 'taking charge' like we're in a relationship and a certain part of me felt relieved to let someone else deal with the haggling. I can be the woman of steel no bull gets past this girl type person when I have to be, but I don't want to HAVE to be that strong person 24/7. It was nice. Deadly in terms of confusing our own nonrelationship but seriously... I just went with the flow to enjoy the evening and give him a buzz. I can be a bit too forthright with him sometimes and didn't want to add to that emasculation by getting peevish about something silly. So I left him to haggle and wandered around to have a look at a few other things with the bemused salesman looking sideways from Angel to myself at times almost quizzically at times and when Angel wasn't looking I got a few smirks as if he knew exactly what I was doing by not doing anyhing.
We did some further window shopping and then he decided he just HAD to buy the same bedsheets as me. How bloody strange is all I can say.
He swings between mister "I am an old fashioned guy who wants to take charge, help and be needed" to "I'm sorry, too much partying to do..who are you again?" ...
Thursday night Max is turning himself inside out rubbing himself all over Angel's legs, claiming Angel's laptop bag as his by rubbing his cheeks over it and generally welcoming Angel into the house. Angel has seen Max almost at his worst back in the days when Max thought all humans were out to hurt him and so he wanted to mutillate them, so Angel was as surprised as me. He gushed about how my cat must like him and insinuating that he was part of the family. My guard was up, I was not going to play any stupid pretend for a night games especially anything that nuts. I've known the guy 3 years and he's called me his angel but never said the 3 little words, never included me in his social life and not really taken me out anywhere. I'm fairly clear on where he is NOT coming from. But damn by the time he left much later, with a comfortable companionship vibe happening, playfullness.. it's still far too much of a trap unless it might actually go somewhere. I'm probably going to end up freaking out and backing away from him again for a bit. Oh and sure enough mister "I'll drunken sms Blondie to let her know I'm thinking of her even when out with the boys" has not been doing any of that for weeks now. Including the whole weekend. He's dropped back off the map again. Just as well I don't NEED him around.
Oh and is it completely ironic that he was watching that crime tv show with Chris Noth on it, and commented on him being Mr Big. Angel has an eery resemblance to Chris Noth and the ironcy of Chris's character on SATC wasn't lost on me. And I don't believe in fairy tale endings. I wish I could but I can't.
